• “Go to the temple.”

The temple is where “worldly lies” about gender roles are unmasked, he says. Therefore it is essential that you go.

But please don’t go in order to serve a mission, which interferes with marriage while you are young. Getting married young is ideal for women because you can still be molded and guided by your husbands like the good Lord intended.

No, rather than taking out your endowments before you serve a mission, it’s better just to go to the temple to learn about your onko olemassa rehellisiГ¤ korealaisia treffisivustoja priesthood, and how you don’t really have it.

This is a section about why women need to love men, full stop, not why men should endeavor to be worthy of that love

1. “Love men.”

Our author begins this section by quoting a New York Times op ed by Mormon writer Nicole Hardy explaining how hard it was for her to find Mr. Right. His take?

A man would have to be crazy to date this woman, for several reasons. Most obviously, she generalizes all single men as pathetic losers while pridefully propping herself up as some victimized princess. And I was short, or as this feminist put it “unlucky,” and the same angry women who complain about shallow guys refused to date me because of my height.

Now sisters, I know that some of you reading this may be protesting that the reason this author had trouble finding a wife had nothing to do with his height and everything to do with his utter lack of respect for women, but you will just have to take his word for it. So get your adulation on:

I was an older man struggling in the dating scene, and there were many woman [sic] who generalized me as a porn addict or socially awkward or something else

I know what you are thinking after reading this: Men do not have “quarks.” Oh, but even the fact that you dismissed this as a mere typo reveals that there is so, so much you don’t know about men. Of course men have quarks, silly. Men contain fathomless depths of fascinating mysteries. Just because you can’t see their subatomic particles with your own eyes just shows how old those eyes are, because you are a presbyopic spinster.

Mic drop. Bar = raised. Apparently it is not enough to stay a virgin when you are single; you also have to remain one while you are a wife and mother.

So to your long list of things to do today, be sure to add “Ask Mary about secret of parthenogenesis.” Your future husband will thank you.

This is a section about why women need to love men, full stop, not why men should endeavor to be worthy of that love

1. “Stop being a feminist.”

It is difficult to be a traditional woman in today’s psychotic Western culture, where every film that Hollywood produces seems to portray women as warrior goddesses who save men from physical danger, and every school teacher props girls up so that they get superior grades.

Yes, all those films like Captain Miss America and Ant-Woman and Batwoman v Superwoman and X-Women may appear empowering, as Hollywood churns out one blockbuster after another in which superheroic women rescue helpless gentlemen in distress, but they are feminist lies. Just as it is a feminist lie that women can get good grades on their own merits. You single women are so dumb that you probably believe you earned those degrees yourself. Ladies, a reality check, please: you did not earn anything that was not handed to you by a magnanimous man. Don’t forget to whom you owe your gratitude.